Love Clinic, Open 24 Hours a Day

Eversince highschool, I was always used to people, whether it be a guy or a girl, going after me seeking for help when it comes to matters of the heart from the simplest to the most complicated situations. A guy friend would pick me up to help him look for a gift to give to the girl he was courting. A girl friend would call me during the wee hours of the night, crying over her boyfriend. Some would even call me to talk to her girlfriend. Some would simply ask for tips (like as if I'm this shit expert on courting and dating). And some would simply want my 'precious' opinion, or payong kaibigan. Even my ex-boyfriend called me once asking for help about his new girlfriend (hindi ito yung minimum wage laborer na mahilig sa fried chicken). Hence, I got the name "The Love Clinic", as one of my highschool guy friend called me.

And since this season is the breakup season, I usually get a lot of calls lately. FEELING!!!

I was sleeping, hoping to sleep the whole morning until the afternoon when my cellphone started ringing. What the hell, it's only 10:45 a.m. This better be important. It was a guy friend of mine, asking me if I know any nice place in Antipolo for a dinner date. He insisted that this date is important, since it is going to be a make or break date with his girlfriend. So he wanted something private where both of them can talk and at the same, spectacular. Can't you just go to Tagaytay? He said he couldn't because he's only free from 7 p.m. up to 11. He said he made reservations somewhere in Intramuros but cancelled the deal because originally, he agreed to pay 10,000 for everything, but the next day they demanded and additional 6,000, which got him mad because he's not that stupid enough to be a 'cash cow'. Why the hell spend 10,000 anyways for a dinner for two? Ah! Crazy things people do for love.

The next thing I know I was with him looking for a neat place. We first tried to find Taktak road to check out Vieux Chalet, this hidden restaurant somewhere in the mountains a friend of his suggested. When we saw the place, my friend found it nice for ordinary days, but too cheap for his budget. "Supot" sabi nga niya. So since we couldn't find any other place, we had no choice but to check our Seven Suites. Turned out that they actually have a moonlight package, ideally for romantic dates, where couples, and even celebrities and son of politicians had their wedding proposals. Not bad, eh?! And since the price is less than his normal budget, I suggested that they try to upgrade the flower boquet and add a little more to the presentation. At some point I felt like a wedding coordinator. And I was loving it. My friend was willing to pay extra. I guess he really wants her back very badly. And for that reason, I was willing to help.

He probably did some mistakes in the past that have hurt her. But he was willing to change. When he asked me if the big event would be a success, all I can tell him was to just pray to God that whatever is meant to happen must happen, and that whatever it is, may acceptance follow.

Tonight is that night and they probably have finished their dinner by now. I just hope that whatever happens, may they always realize God's purpose in it and that this may serve as a lesson to them. And whatever decisions they make tonight, may they prove it to themselves and to each other that such decision was the right choice to make.

God bless all the couples out there.

A couple of pictures taken from P&A training sessions.

The Night I Met My Almost, But Not Quite Soulmate

I can't believe how time flies. I'm already working for two weeks now. Well, technically working, but currently still undergoing training. Trainee din ako.

So far, everything's smooth except my bad habit of spending. I so much suck at budgeting. But aside from the expenses, I really feel that I made the right decision on my chosen career. I really really do. I guess this choice has a lot of growth and potential opportunities to offer. Though I would be making a lot of cash outlay, most of it wouldn't be charged to expense, but rather, experience.

Last Thursday, for instance, was one of the best days I've had to add in this chapter of my book. I remember once typing "Constantine" on the "Who do I want to meet" field on friendster, not realizing that I would actually see him in flesh. Yes, for those of you who do not know, Constantine Maroulis is actually here in Manila and I was one of those crazy crowd in Greenbelt 3, watching him perform live--for FREE! It's not actually free though, I spent a few on coffee and dinner just so that we could get a seat at Seattle's Best without getting bad stares on people. And not to mention the amount I paid for parking from 7 a.m. 'til 10 p.m. After office hours, Ava and I went straight to Greenbelt 3 to plan our strategic positioning for the night's event. Surprisingly, we weren't the only people crazy enough to wait for hubby dubby Constantine for two and a half hours. There were a lot of people already when we got there, and we were lucky enough to get a table. Cathy arrived just in time, and there we were, along with the other ladies who also think, like me, that Constantine was their soulmate. Oh please, he's all mine.

In fairness to Ayala ha, they started on time, as in 8 p.m. sharp, Constantine was there. And as soon as he got on stage, we couldn't help but screeeeeeeam! Nagpaka-cheap na kami as in! Everytime he looks at our side, we wave at him! But it's ok! Kahit nagmukha na kaming madungis sa pawis at init, okey lang! We didn't care! Seeing him and hearing his voice live was so much worth it. Priceless!

It was a one hour show that we wouldn't stop talking about for a week and I wouldn't forget all my life. At least I have a story to tell my grandchildren that I once went gaga over some American Idol in Manila. Now that Ava, Cathy and I call ourselves "groupies" and decided to make this as a habit, I don't think it would only happen once in my life.

Badtrip lang, I ran out of memory from my camera because I was stupid enough not to upload the pictures I took the other day. And I was too much excited watching him that my video shots were all blurry and shakey. God how I wish I have a zoom lens. If I ever got the chance to get a picture with him, it would probably also look like Kim's picture when she saw Champ Lui-Pio (see previous post for this).

And at the end of the show, he said in this calm, yet powerful voice, "My name is Constantine." Ay grabe, mamatay-matay ako nun.

Seeing Constantine wipe his sweat or stroke his hair is like feeling a hypnotic sensational feeling. He's like my epitome of a HOT GUY. And seeing and hearing him sing "I Can't Make You Love Me" and "Bohemian Rhapsody" is like the best. LUPIT EVER TALAGA!

Hay, life, you're so good to me.

In Shopping You Gain Wisdom

I am always fascinated with the way chemistry works between two people. And it has always remained to be a mystery to me and to most of us why things work that way. But before we open the container for the chemistry to take its place, most of us couldn't help but to read first the label and check the whole package.

I know, it sucks, but that's one of the harsh sides of reality. Admit it, most of us, when it comes to having an attraction to the opposite sex, we apply our principles of shopping.

For instance, when we shop for shoes, we try to consider so many things. Each one of us is a different type of shoe, and what sells us depends on so many different things from design to quality to comfort to means of marketing strategy and yes, even up to packaging.

The ideal shoe, of course, would include comfort, style and brand. But of course, having those three would make it expensive. Not everyone of us could afford that. On the shoe's point of view, not everyone gets to afford us, unless we set our price too low and become cheap. Cheeeeeeeeeeap! Each one of us is a different type of shoe, and we look for the perfect feet to bring us home. And we too are consumers as well, trying to find the perfect pair of shoes, or at least, close to perfect that we can afford.

When we want someone to like us, first we need to think to ourselves what type of shoe we are.
Am I comfy enough for one's feet to wear? Meaning, am I not too much of a nagging bitch or an asshole for someone to fit in?

How am I designed? Genuine leather or synthetic? Solid color or prints? Black or bold? Meaning, how do I look like and am I good looking enough for someone to like? And am I likeable enough for other people to appreciate the one wearing them.

And so considering these questions, our tendency is to try to blend all the qualities we have and be ready for the market. The more we possess comfort and style, the higher the value we become. But of course, some expensive shoes may not be as good as they look, but wearing them makes you feel like you are walking on the clouds. Rockport, Aerosoles and Naturalizer shoes may not be trendy, but they great for your feet and prevents vains getting visible on your legs. And some feels like hell on your feet, but are the nicest you've seen, which makes it pricey as well. Janylin for instance, has great designs, but are a little pricey for what they can offer and one hell of a footkiller.

And when it comes to liking someone, we try to shop around the market.

First, we check our pockets and try to see how much we are willing or at least can afford to spend for a pair of shoes. Sad to say, but some guys take this literally that they think the more money they have, the better the girls they get. Sad to say too, but some girls get attracted more on the cash than on the looks. But what I am talking about here is not the literal monetary budget we allot for shopping, but the effort that we are willing to give up for love.

The more money we are willing to spend, the better the chance we get on finding the perfect pair of shoes. When you know you have a lot of money on your pocket, you can afford both comfort and style, and the brand to add to that. The more effort you are willing to give and the more chances you are willing to take, the better chances you have on finding your love.

Second, we try to assess to ourselves what we really want to buy. Some go for just the comfort and don't care about the style, some just want their shoes to look good on them to match on their clothes and personalities and some want both. Some would just settle for any shoe, just for the sake of having something to wear.

Third, the best part, is the shopping part. We head to the mall and stroll around for the perfect pumps. By checking at the brand, we know if we are going to enter the store or not. We look at the window display and see if anything catches our attention. Once our eyes set on something we like, we try it on. Some check the price first and not try it on because it's over the budget. Some try it on, find it good, check the price, and leave. Or even tough luck, it doesn't come on your size. Or even tougher, it's the last pair and it's already taken. It's this whole trial and error thing. This is all about the perfect combination of everything. Combination, as associated with mixture, as associated with blending, are all associated with chemistry. It all boils down to chemistry.

What type of a shoe are we and what type of consumer do we want?

What type of shoe do we want and how much are we willing to spend for it?

It's all about the meeting in between of the right shoe and the right consumer. Like I said before, perfect person must meet perfect timing.

Let us also keep in mind that we may have both comfort and style, but very few people can afford us if we set our price too high. It's how much you are willing to give and how much you are willing to receive. We may dream to be a Manolo, but we have to keep in mind that not everyone can afford a Manolo Blahnik. We may want to be a Nine West, but there are more people who try it on than the people who actually buy them. We may want to be a Janylin, but people may buy you because you look great, but would curse you everytime you're worn until you are only worn on special occassions, and will eventually get thrown away.

It would also depend on the feet that would wear you. Someone may buy a pair of Manolo Blahniks as an investment and keep you shiny and polished forever, worn only on special occasions. Some people may buy a Nine West in an instant, for their known qualities and wear them as part of their uniform. Someone might buy Janylins and wouldn't care if their feet hurt because some people just have this mentality that if they look good, they feel good. As consumers, it's normal to have a lot of considerations before acutally buying. We think first before we act because we are afraid to get embarassed and to get hurt. And as for the brands, be careful of what brands you buy. Not all expensive brands are worth it. They just try to make themselves look expensive, but they are actually not far from the cheap ones. Cheeeeeeeeeap!

And what is so fascinating when you associate the whole searching thing with meant to be situations. Did it ever happen to you when you just fell in love with a pair of shoes in an instant you saw it and you want it so bad but a part of you keeps you from buying it? Then you make a deal to yourself that when you come back next week and it's still there you will buy it, and when it's not there anymore, then it's just not meant for you. This happened to me a lot of times already, though in the shopping sense only, to the point where I couldn't sleep just thinking if I should have bought it. Don't you just find it funny that things like this is so applicable in real life? Don't you just wish that if you are to become a shoe that someone would just fall in love with you and buy you right away? Or when we get attracted to a person instantly, we look for signs, meant to be moments, or even serendipities?

And I never stop dreaming of falling in love in an instant with a person the same way as I fell in love once with a shoe so much that I bought it and didn't care how much it cost and if it would hurt when worn that until now I still wear it. Or I also wouldn't mind settling with someone like this pair of white flats that I just bought from the tiangge at a bargain that has a design I find so cute and so comfy. And it just amazes me that until now it still manages to stay in good shape even if I wore it almost everyday for several weeks and have struggled through floody sidewalks with it during the rainy season.

And of course, no matter how expensive your shoes are, it would always hurt the first time around until the leather softens. Like for example, I bought a pair of Naturalizers. The style is just basic, nothing trendy at all. A little expensive than my normal budget, but knowing the brand, I know they are great for everyday use in Makati. The first day I wore it, I got small blisters on my feet because the leather was still hard. I could have just bought a new one if I had the money or could have had it stretched, or just wear my old pairs, but I just chose to put band aids all over my feet and wear it the whole week until the leather softens and it gets comfortable on my feet because everytime I wear them, my legs don't get tired at the end of the day. Same as in relationships, the first few months or years may be tough, but as long as you can stand it and willing to get wounded and get healed and willing to compromise, things will get smooth eventually.

Ideally, we aim for all the categories to be checked on our list. Ideally we look for something that is perfect. Perfection is unattainable if it is to be defined as the one used in the dictionaries. Realistically, perfection is not absolute nor constant. The actual definition of perfection depends on how we want it to be and on what we need in order to make us happy. The word perfect, as others would find difficult to achieve, would be just as easy as picking an apple from a tree if we know within ourselves what we really want and need and associate it with the word contentment. Just be the right pair of shoes that a particular pair of feet is looking for. Be someone's favorite pair of shoes. Tell the shoe that it deserves to be worn. And make the feet feel that they made the wise choice, the right purchase.

I love this song!

Thank you Cathy, for finally, after months and months of playing this song over and over again, I now know the title.

Love Alone
by Caedmon's Call

No one would love me
if they knew all the things I hide
My words fall to the floor
As tears drip through the telephone line

And the hands I’ve seen raised to the sky
Not waving but drowning all this time
I'll try to build an ark that they need
To float to you upon the crystal sea

Give me your hand to hold
'Cause I can't stand to love alone
And love alone is not enough to hold us up
We've got to touch your robe
So swing your robe down low
Swing your robe down low

The prince of despair's been beaten
But the loser still fights
Death's on a long leash
Stealing my friends to the night

And everyone cries for the innocent
You say to love the guilty too
And I'm surrounded by suffering and sickness
So I'm working tearing back the roof

And the pain of the world is a burden
And it's my cross to bear
And I stumble under all the weight
I know you're Simon standing there
And I know you're standing there

Wishlist 05

Okay people. To save you all from the trouble, trying to think what gift to give me, I decided to come up with my wishlist for Christmas. And just to remind you, 2 days after that is my birthday, so I made a longer list--a little extra for you. Christmas is different from birthdays so allot a bigger budget for me because you would have to give me two. And I made this a little earlier so that people (ahem, like my kuyas) would not have any reasons not to give me something for my birthday and of course, to have you all saving up as early as now. Hehehehe!

If you feel like being generous...

• iPod Photo or iPod Nano (black). I love taking pictures, and sometimes, when I'm out, I ran out of memory! That's one bad trip. iPod photo would give storage to my photos while I travel and it keeps everything in order. This would become useful too everytime I go to the gym.
• Sony memory stick PRO 512 MB and up. Better storage capacity for my camera!
• Motorolla Razr phone (black). I just love this phone. I'm currently using a jurassic Nokia 7250 model that looks like it was used as a scotchbrite kitchen scrubber.
• Tripod for my camera. I'm just using a Sony Cybershot. Any tripod which can hold it will do.
• Shopping spree. I need clothes, for powerdressing. I would be wearing a three-piece suit everyday.
• Shoes. I need pumps to use at the office. Size seven or seven and a half, kitten heels only. I couldn't stand high heels. No Janylin's please.
• The basic black bag. Medium sized leather bags great to use at the office. White will be good too!
• Cross pendants. I love cross pendants especially those with fancy designs.

If you're a little tight on the budget...

• Movie tickets. Take me out on a movie. I'd love to!
• Jolly meal. I'm so craving for a Jollibee burger steak right now!
• Ice cream. Selecta's coffee crumble or anything with nuts.
• Slippers. I love flat thong slippers! No rubber flip flops please because I'm allergic to rubber.
• CDs. Original CDs. I'm against piracy, especially when it comes to OPMs.
• Paolo Coelho books. I've read some of them already, but I just borrowed the books. I love his books so much that I want my own copy especially The Alchemist.
• Pablo Neruda CD. This will make me melt!!!

My basic necessities. Which means the more, the merrier!

• Starbucks gift certificates. I need a daily dose of espresso, soy and syrup.
• Thongs. Heehee. Girlstuff. This is for my girl friends out there.
• Wallets. I just can't get enough of them!

Of course the list goes on. I'll update this next time. And don't forget, it's also my birthday two days after Christmas!

A Halloweenie Weekend (late post)

This blog has been dead for so long now. And so many many many things have been happening lately and nothing has been documented! Waahh! I just have so much stuff to share that I don't know where to start! And I can't believe I've let some of my greatest thoughts pass by without even a single attempt to at least put it on a toilet paper.
I'll try to recall everything.
Hope the espresso shot I took hours ago is still effective.
Take a deep breath.
Here it goes...

The Weekend Before Undas.
My friend, Rachie, dragged me to attend a party with her at Valle 4. It was the birthday of one of her blockmates in Ateneo Law School. I had fun and didn't get bored--at all. I had dizzy moments and had a red face most of the times, but i'm cool. It's nice to meet the future lawyers of this country. And all I can say is that they work hard, they play hard. Seriously, they surely do know how to have fun. I wouldn't elaborate on that anymore. I just enjoyed being the observer. Enough said.

The next day, I missed most of daylight. I woke up at 4:30 p.m. only to find out that I have to go at a dinner party for my cousin's birthday in Makati. He told me to bring along a date with me. Since getting a male date is close to impossible at that time, I decided to take my friend Millan with me in order not to waste my invite (afterall, it's a rib-eye steak dinner for me), and also asked her to take me on a Makati nightlife tour since I wasn't able to enjoy it that much in college due to so many commitments and commitments, and consider it as a "farewell bum tour" since I would be starting to work already. I had a blast. Went to different places for the first time. And only spent on a parking ticket, which Millan and I shared. Now that's what I call, coolness pare! (I took pictures of us while moonbathing but I uploaded it on my brother's laptop, so I'll just post them next time.)

October 31st, Heavenly Halloween.
For the past seventeen years of my life, this has been my Halloween party--staying overnight at Heaven's Gate Memorial Park. If you find sleeping at the cemetery during October 31st weird, well, you're probably not one of the gazillions (exaj, mga hundreds to thousands lang siguro) that I see every year at the cemetery. Therefore, you're a lewser. Kidding!

Everyone, meet my sister, Marianne...

About the flower arrangement, I apologize. I do not know what my mother was thinking, but I found it hideous. Those sampaguitas on sticks remind me of the black Nazarene, lying down and being toured around our province's barrio. Anyway...For those of you who do not know, I had a sister once. She died when she was fifteen years old because of leukemia. Yes it's true that the good die young. She was the good daughter and sister, and I, even at the most dangerous situations, still remains to be alive and bitchin'. People say I look like her, only that she's a lot more prettier. I guess she deserves the credit. Rest in peace, sistah. I'll see you when I get there.

And my brother, being the good and caring brother that he is, asked me to help him put up the tent at the rooftop. After actually putting it up mostly by myself, he got inside and slept, without even asking any one of us if we wanted to share it with him.

So I just rolled a mat beside it and started gazing at the stars. That night, the sky wasn't spectacular. Nevertheless, it didn't bore me. I was easily amused like I always was.

Gone were the days when many of our relatives would stay overnight with us. Now it's only my family, an aunt, and a couple of cousins who would only stay for a couple of hours. It used to be so much fun and now, it has become more of just a tradition, hopefully not to become just an obligation.

And of course, what can amuse you more than always having a camera with you?

I remember the other day, my Connecticut brother emailed me pictures of what I've missed in their place--autumn, which made me wanting to go back very badly. It's the only season I haven't experienced back there. Next time I get back, I'm making sure it falls during fall. This is my nephew Jago, and niece, Marielle.

I just hope everyone enjoyed their own halloween party as much or even much more than I did. As for my nephew Jago, I'm pretty sure he had the best trick or treat this year...

He reminded me of chickenjoy. Definitely far far better than his first halloween where his daddy dressed him up as the devil.